Fishy

Though we’d rather drop it off at her house, B wants her birthday present tonight, at Cafe Azzurro. If it was new shoes or a bird feeder, we wouldn’t drag our feet, but she asked for a fish. Obliging her whim, we replace the restaurant’s center piece with the glass vase bearing the little orange goldfish. Realizing her chance to make a scene as the waiter passes, B puts the vase to her lips and pretends to drink. Fishy water slips past her lips, causing her to spit and gag. At least the waiter hasn’t noticed her thermos of vodka.