Fig Newton Eater

The useful children that we were, Libby, Sarah, and I decided to put our skills to use. As strongest, Sarah was obliged to assist in all jar-opening activities. Libby was employed only on the drive home from the ice cream store, at which time she was called upon to hold our cones as we buckled our seatbelts. Too young to be useful, I chose to gobble up dropped Fig Newtons, thus sparing others the trouble. Not surprisingly, the position of ‘Fig Newton Eater’ was not nearly as honorable as ‘Opener,’ and even less frequently used than the ‘Ice Cream Holder.’